Seasons and legacies

seasons

Seasons in Life

Life does not always go as planned. You see yourself doing one thing, and then all of a sudden you end up doing something else. 

At the beginning of this year, I vowed I would continue writing. I would blog regularly, submit write ups, seriously begin writing my second book… 

The plan was to travel and then write about my travels. The plan was to write about my fitness journey. The plan was to chronicle my every day and write about the new things that I learned from the business I am running. The plan was to write about the people that I meet and the experiences I shared with them. 

It is already the last week of November. It is almost the end of the year. So far, I think this is only my fourth blog for the year. Okay, so I was able to have another published write-up elsewhere. But no new book… No draft even. I have (ghost)written several business letters. That’s about it.  The longest I have written were — grocery or laundry lists. 

Yey to the writer! 😦 

Contrary to what some people think, I don’t just spend my days working out at the gym. Actually, several months back I said I will write about my fitness journey, but I never got around to doing that, as well… *sigh*

I have been running a business for eleven months now and it pretty much takes up my every waking moment. There are days of the week that I get so exhausted, I get cranky, I get so stressed. I go to the gym to de-stress… which, come to think of it, is basically why I go to the gym a lot.

It is hard to compose anything when your mind’s all over the place. 

Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining about having and running a business. Though it’s a start-up and it’s small, I consider it a blessing.  I also have every intention of making it grow. Thus, my full attention.

I am learning new things and I interact with people on a professional level. I am reminded of how it is to deal with subordinates. I get to boss people around. (Okay I am kidding on the last one… sort of.) 

But when I am on work mode, I am on work mode. Sadly, my writing has taken a back seat.

Yes, I sometimes long for those peaceful moments when inspiration just comes easy and I can write nonstop. I do miss those moments. I haven’t had that in a while… 

SO I was having quite a crappy difficult week last week… then this came in the mail…

Unexpected, unannounced…

20

I have been immortalized. 

…or at least, my published work lives on for fifty years after my demise. 

God has a sense of humor… and His timing is always perfect.

He reminded me of a personal accomplishment, something I should be proud of.

Yet I also think it’s His way of telling me that if I was able to do it before, then I can do it again. When it’s time to seriously go back to writing mode, I will know.

But I am to learn what I am supposed to learn right here, right now. 

I think He’s telling me to go with and through this season and just chill. 🙂

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven…” Ecclesiastes 3:1 KJV

 

*****

photo credits : Seasons via google images; Copyright Certificate of the book Twenty Years in Between via author’s iPhone. ❤

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No.Internet.Connection

The first thing I do when I wake up on a normal weekday morning is to go to my corner in the living room, play worship songs on YouTube using my iPad, then open my Bible app and read verses. 

After quiet time, I go and check my FB messenger to see if there were messages that came in middle of the night. After which I go and check my Yahoo mail for more messages. Then I go to my WordPress account to look at my blog stats. On some mornings I do online banking.

My best friend normally messages me early morning and on days when we are not rushing to go somewhere, we end up chatting online. Some mornings I chat with my person from LA, too. 

Eventually I will check my Facebook notifications and news feed and I will find out what’s happening in the world. I see pictures and get updated on previous day’s happenings… I will see sunrise photos from various places… I will find out what certain people had for breakfast… I will know the traffic situation.

I haven’t stepped out of the house — have not finished my first cup of coffee even — yet I will already know so much about what has transpired, and what is currently transpiring, in the outside world.

I am just so connected.

***

My plan for today was to stay home and write. I planned to blog. I also planned to write another article for an online publication.  

I have been out a lot lately, thanks to all the Christmas shopping and get-togethers, that I haven’t had the chance to write much. So last night, I promised myself that today, I will just stay home and write.

I will drink lots of coffee and I will blog. I will blog about my upcoming birthday and how the thought of getting another year older stresses me out.

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Writer Me

I had it all planned. It will be a quiet “writer’s day” for me.  Even my YouTube playlist is all planned and ready.

***

When I woke up this morning, the first thing I did was to check my mails. Couldn’t connect. Hmm. Something must be wrong with the network. I tried to access YouTube. Nothing. Facebook Messenger. No internet connection. Hmm. That’s weird. I was online ’til before midnight last night…

I checked my cellphone. No signal. Goodness, what is happening?? I can’t send messages online, nor can I send text messages using my cellphone.

I felt so cut-off from the outside world and I was getting destabilized. How will I upload my blog? How will I message my friends?? How will I listen to my worship songs?? I CAN’T even access my iPad Bible!! 😦

As I felt the panic starting to rise from within, it then dawned on me that — uhm, I forgot to pay for our phone and internet bill which was due last Friday.  Because of the hustle and bustle of the season — and yes, with all the shopping and lunches that I have been doing, I completely forgot to pay my bills. Ergo, my internet got cut.

My cellphone signal is another issue altogether. I think it was really just weak. In my case, dead. 

It wasn’t even 6:30am, yet I was already frazzled. Not exactly a pleasing sight on an early Monday morning.

***

I was on the verge of a tantrum. I wanted to kick myself for being forgetful and I wanted to curse the cellphone network to high heavens for having weak signal. I was seriously contemplating throwing my cellphone away. 

And then I caught myself… and I stopped.

A voice in me asked, How difficult would it be to last a morning without gadgets… without the internet… without wi-fi?  Is it really that bad?

Gadgets vs Old-school

Sure, I said I’ll write… But I can write the draft first on a pad paper. I have always liked writing my thoughts long hand before transferring them to the computer, anyway. I enjoy seeing my erasures.

I don’t really need my Bible app since I have my old reliable Bible that I can open and read. Plus, I don’t think the earth will stop spinning if I don’t get to text or chat with my friends in the morning… Nor will I miss out on a lot of things if I don’t get to check Facebook.

And I can always sing worship songs a capella…

Perhaps a few hours of disconnect will do me good. 

Maybe a few hours gadget-free and without social media will give me the peace that I need. 

It is quite liberating when you think about it.

***

shopping

Favorite past time…

I ended up spending the rest of the morning doing more Christmas shopping with my mom (yey!) while I asked someone to settle my phone bills. My mom and I even met up with my sister for lunch. My day of recluse was instead spent with family, with actual conversations happening face to face. 

When I got home mid-afternoon, I noticed that my internet has been reconnected. I did not rush to check anything online, though. Instead I fixed the gifts that I bought, and I talked to my best friend on the phone. 

The online world probably did not miss me… which was okay since I was busy living life in the real world.

The day was light and easy, gadget-free. It was a good day after all.

Tomorrow, I will write my birthday blog. 🙂 

barbie-bday

the Betsy cake 🙂

***

photo credits: Writer, shopping and Barbie cake photos via google images

Blogging day #2

blogging

Coffee is vital in blogging…

 

I began the year with a blog (Yey for me!).

As I ushered in the new year, the plan — or the goal — was to write regularly, have a blog entry everyday if possible.  The operative word there being “everyday”  and not “if possible.”

It is now January 5, and so far this is my 2nd blog entry for the year. Hmm… Is that bad??

In case you guys are interested to know what goes on behind the scenes as I compose a masterpiece of a blog, let me give you an idea…

Writing is my passion.  I keep saying that.  I can express myself better through the written word.  But of course the ideas always begin in the mind.  I hear conversations in my head even before I put them down on paper. Just so we are clear, I am not schizophrenic or anything.  I just test out lines or sentences in my head before I actually write them down or type them on the computer.  Other writers probably do the same thing… or maybe not.

But anyhow, that’s how it starts for me… I get an idea, I ‘run’ it in my head, then I jot the words down before I lose them. I get excited, I write or type a few lines… and then after which, most of the time, I go blank.

When I say blank, I mean BLANK. 

So I stand up, make myself a cup of coffee. I wait for the next wave of inspiration to come.  And then I get distracted by the tv.

Just a while ago, the latest episode of Supergirl was on air.  I sat in front of the tv a few minutes… okay, until the episode ended. (It was quite an interesting episode so I thought of finishing it.)

After making coffee and watching a bit of tv, I go back in front of my computer.  Did I tell you that my desktop is right beside my cabinet which has a full length mirror?  So every time I turn to look at my left, I see myself (hard at work?! I wish!).  And when I see my reflection, I remember the things that I forgot to do — like put moisturizer on my face, for one!

I stop what I’m doing and I get my moisturizer… and my body lotion… and oh yeah, maybe I should put a little make up on so I won’t look too pale. Besides, you’ll never know who will drop by and visit.

Moisturizer, check. Lotion, check, lipstick and eyeliner, check. A dab of cologne, check.  I comb my hair, make sure it’s straight and not stringy. And then I am all set.

What was it that I was doing in the first place??? Oh yeah, blogging. I was trying to blog.  That mirror can be very distracting.

I suddenly get a surge of inspiration, so I once again head back to my computer and key in a few paragraphs… And then the dogs outside start barking, calling for attention. I pretend not to hear at first.  Can’t shut them out for long, though, so I stand up once again.

This is why I prefer to do my writing in the middle of the night when it’s quiet and every one’s asleep. Less distractions.  As long as I have my coffee, I’m good to go.

***

What is the formula in coming out with a good article?   When is the best time to write? When do you get the inspiration?

To be honest about it in my writing experience, the articles (write ups, published essays, blogs and what have yous) that I most liked or that I thought were the nicest were the ones which I thought about at the craziest times.  Be it while I’m in the shower… or while I’m doing the grocery… or yes, in the middle of the night when everyone’s asleep but me.

Most of these write ups begin on a small piece of paper. Because when you suddenly get that inspiration to write, well, you just grab the nearest blank paper you can find and let the words flow.

Sitting in front of the computer hoping the words will magically appear on the screen just don’t work.  Most often than not I end up stalking people on Facebook (that was a joke! Of course I don’t stalk people on Facebook…) 😉

My advice: When inspiration comes, grab it! Run those words, those lines in your head.  Then jot them down right away, lest you forget.  Just keep writing, let your creative juices flow… it is easy to edit afterwards, anyway.

Before you know it, you have created a masterpiece… Something for the world to enjoy and learn from.  Or maybe not.

At the very least, you would have created a blog entry.  Much like this one. 🙂

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This is just so ME!

 

***

photo credits : “To blog or not to blog” via microweber.com ; “Writer hard at work” via FB page of author Susan Elizabeth Phillips (I just love her!)

 

 

Blogging Report Card

i’ll be happy with 100 hits a MONTH!!
delirious, even.

I realized just a while ago that as of this writing, this blogsite has:

  •  43 posts (44 including this one)
  • 603 site visits
  • 22 approved comments
  • 1 pending SPAM
  • 32 followers (groovy bunch! thanks!!)
  • 100 likes on the site (yey!)
  • a gazillion tags (which don’t seem to work)

Some trivia:

  • this blog was created July 2011 after i decided to come out of my secret alternate blog universe (where i was regarded as a goddess, mind you), so i can write as who i really am… an ordinary being with extraordinary wit and humor. yeah, right.  a humble one, too.
  • only 1 blog was posted on that first month — my welcome post.
  • i posted the most number of blogs just last month, Sept 2012.  I posted 14.
  • my day to day activities prevent me from dishing out my daily doses.
  • truthfully, i don’t always have the inspiration to write anything.  most of the time i just end up whining about losing my writing abilities.  like today…

My blogging goals:

  • 800 site visits before the year ends. i think that’s a pretty conservative goal.  i can go for 1000… miracles do happen… but i want to be realistic.  so 800, it is!
  • at least 50 followers by year end.  i love seeing that i have new followers.  honestly, knowing that i have them inspires me even more to write.  it’s different when you know that you have an audience.  i am more careful with what i write — because i don’t want to disappoint (though this blog post is probably turning into a disappointment as we speak…).  but, thank you, dear followers.  you keep me going.
  • to have at least 200 likes.
  • to have more comments — and even blog conversations with my readers.  that would be nice.

My promises:

  • i will try not to talk much about baseball.  try being the operative word.  there’s got to be more in my life to write about than just that.
  • i will make time for blogging.
  • i promise not to whine — about anything.  so if you catch me whining, do stop me.
  • i promise that my posts will make sense.  whether it’s funny, witty, a little sad or somewhat deep and profound… it should have a meaning.  it should leave my readers with something to think about, ponder on… or at the very least make you feel good that you read or saw the post.  if it makes someone smile, that will be more than enough.

My present grade:

If i were to grade my blogsite today… Okay, I’d rather not.  As a student, i was never a fan of getting low marks and i’m not going to start now.  I had a class adviser who called me a perfectionist — which made me cry my eyes out (i cried perfectly, if i may say so myself…).  He said i don’t like making mistakes (who does??!). I was hurt when I heard that, but then i guess he knew what he was talking about.  Oh well, that’s another story to be told another day.

Suffice it to say that i am not so happy with how my blog is performing at the moment… basically i know that I can do better.  So, here’s to the last quarter of the year and all the blogging that I will be doing!

I may not be the (super)goddess writer that I was a couple of years back, but I’ll try to be as interesting.  Hope you’ll continue to enjoy the adventure with me! 🙂

 

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photo credit: google images