Something to ponder on…

forgive

Cuteness overload 

I AM SURE that we all, at some point in time, have been disappointed by someone close to us. A friend, a family member, a partner, a loved one… someone you trusted. It’s not a good feeling.

Most of the time, with disappointment comes hurt. We end up feeling betrayed. We wonder how the person we thought we knew can be capable of totally disregarding how we may feel. So we become wary. We question if that person is still worthy of our trust. 

Our first instinct is to take care of ourselves and make sure that the person who disappointed or hurt us doesn’t get the chance to do it all over again. We guard ourselves from more disappointment. We build walls around to protect us. 

But man in his frailty is prone to making mistakes. We all fall short. Sometimes we hurt other people without meaning to. Sometimes, other people hurt us.

Some people turn bitter and find it hard to trust again.  Others are more forgiving and believe in giving second chances. 

Ultimately, the choice is yours. You can be bitter, you can walk away, or you can forgive.

Choose that which will liberate you.

Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart. All you who hope in the Lord– Ps. 31:24 

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Leaving this here…

apology

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photos via google images

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Friendship is…

my kind of friendship

Spent the most part of my Monday morning chatting on the phone with one of my best girlfriends.  Somehow the minutes just seemed to tick away so fast, yet the topics seemed endless.

We talked about baseball (yes, baseball mom she is!)… we talked about upcoming tournaments… we talked about my son’s school, then we talked about her son’s school… we talked about interfering and overbearing parents (yes, that’s gossip)… we talked about our plans for our sons’ future (which didn’t only cover baseball, but their lives in general)… We pretty much covered a lot of things in just one phone call.

That’s our kind of friendship.  We talk a lot.  We share our thoughts, our experiences… we dissect them and we try to find answers to questions together.  We talk and we also listen.  It’s not just a one way thing.

***

I met her because of baseball.  She was a veteran baseball mom of sorts when my son was just starting and she took us under her wing (she was team manager then).   I didn’t really expect that we will end up being good friends, but through the years, situations and experiences (hers and mine) paved the way for us to get to know each other better.  Our values are the same, we pretty much think alike, and during those times that we don’t exactly agree on something (which is pretty rare), we still respect the other person’s views.  We don’t judge nor force our ideas on each other.  At the end of the day, it’s still about respect.

no need for a pinky swear…

What strengthens our friendship is the fact that we both know that whatever happens, we will stand by each other and we have each other’s backs.  And we have proven this to each other on different occasions — she was there to listen and support me when some people were being mean… and I was there for her when she was the one being attacked maliciously by people who claimed to be her friends.

***

There’s more to friendship than just the label.  You can address someone as your “BFF” (Best Friend Forever) or “SFF” (Super Friend Forever) or whatever other adjective you want to put before the FF… But I believe it doesn’t work that way.

To me friendship is about trust and respect.  It’s about knowing that whatever happens, the other person will stand by you and will help you fight your battles.  A real friend listens and doesn’t judge.  Sometimes he or she may not understand, but the willingness to do so is always there.

Friends may argue but in the end the relationship should be strong enough to withstand whatever differences they may have.

Personally, I’d rather have a few real friends than a lot of flaky ones — those who will drop you like a hot potato the moment they find out that you are in trouble, or worse, when they realize that you are not of any service to them.  Meaning, user-friendly people — and boy, are there lots of them!

So, maybe I choose my friends.  I know I am not ‘friendly’ with everybody.  I choose the people I call my real friends.  An acquaintance to me is still just that — an acquaintance.  There is no depth to the relationship.  But I put great value on what I have with people I consider my friends.  I know that I will fight with them and for them if need be.

Whether I talk to my friends two hours a day, three times a week… or we only get to talk for five harried minutes, once a month… I rest on the knowledge and confidence that our friendship stays the same.  It is a relationship backed by beliefs and values, experiences, history, love, trust and respect.

you just know that they are there

Friendship to me is more than just a label.

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all photos via google images

 

What I learned today

up and down…
down and up

The past couple of months have been quite an emotional rollercoaster ride for me.

A series of events made me go through all kinds of emotions — disappointment, anxiety, worry, disgust, anger… the list goes on.

I do believe, though, that even in bad circumstances, one is bound to learn something.

These are the things I learned from everything that has been happening in my little world lately.  Some of which I already knew, but the universe has a way of reminding us about the things that we ought to learn and remember…

1.  Friendships do not happen overnight.  And sadly, they are easier broken than built.

2.  You cannot be everybody’s friend.  Hard as you try.

3.  A person’s true character is revealed during difficult or trying times… not when things are good.

4.  Same thing goes with friendship.  True friends are those who will stand and stick by you,  through thick or thin.

5.  You cannot buy breeding.  Nor can you buy character.

6.  People are not always appreciative so don’t expect them to be.

7.  You cannot expect everybody to always agree with you or think the way you do.  Besides, life will be boring if that’s the case.

8.  There will always be people who have a lot to say — about what you do, about what other people do, about the system, about the weather.  If what they say doesn’t do you any good, just shut them out.

9.  Stay away from negative, toxic people.  They will suck the energy out of you.

10.  It’s all about perspective.  When you feel like your world is closing in on you, step back a little.  Find a better view.  Breathe.  You may not be able to change the situation, but you can change your outlook.

11.  You cannot please everybody, help everybody, make everybody happy.  But being one person’s hero is enough.  Be that hero.

12.  Stick to your non-negotiables.  They define who you are.

swing hard
go out swinging

Life is about the ups and downs, good times and bad, hits and misses.

We wake up each morning not knowing what the day has in store for us.  We are not always ready for the curve balls that life throws our way.

I may not always anticipate the curve balls, but I intend to go out swinging… And I will bring the lessons I learned with me to fight another day.

 

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photos via google images/clip art